So, you think only yanks are dumb, right? Let’s see for real! :)

You want to know the best way to put those yanks in their place? Just tell them, “You Amerikkkans are all stupid!” Tell them how low their IQ scores are, how they can’t pass the SAT, and how they cannot find any countries on the map. Tell them how they don’t know anything about their own countries let alone anything about the world outside them. If you still haven’t irritated them enough to get them off their “superior” throne of “religious patriotism”, one thing that is sure to make a yank fall flat on their feet and surrender to their holy righteous elitist friends across the pond and to the north of the border is to send them a link to this video.

By now, you should feel better. The yank has listened. He or she may become defensive, but you know in your heart that, “you won”.

But did you? Well, you may have fooled some yanks into thinking that they’re less superior to you. It is those yanks that truly don’t know about the rest of the world and about the people living in their own country. Pray (in the secular way, of course) your darndest that you’ve insulted a dumb yank. But what if you are insulting a yank who knows… a little something. We yanks who DO know a thing or two are a bit more common than you’d like to think. So, be careful — as you don’t know who you’re running up against.

So, did you really win?

Anybody who knows about this “jaywalking industry”, will also know that they interview hundreds of Americans and just pick the dumbest ones to broadcast on air. And this is another thing to keep in mind: (Courtesy of Bruce Bawer)

One reason why Europeans view Americans as ignorant is that when we don’t know something, we’re more likely to admit it freely and ask questions. While Americans, I saw, cherished liberty, Europeans tended to take it for granted or dismiss it as a naïve or cynical, and somehow vaguely embarrassing, American fiction.

I found myself toting up words that begin with i: individuality, imagination, initiative, inventiveness, independence of mind. Americans, it seemed to me, were more likely to think for themselves and trust their own judgments, and less easily cowed by authorities or bossed around by “experts”; they believed in their own ability to make things better. No wonder so many smart, ambitious young Europeans look for inspiration to the United States, which has a dynamism their own countries lack, and which communicates the idea that life can be an adventure and that there’s important, exciting work to be done. Reagan-style “morning in America” clichés may make some of us wince, but they reflect something genuine and valuable in the American air. Europeans may or may not have more of a “sense of history” than Americans do (in fact, in a recent study comparing students’ historical knowledge, the results were pretty much a draw), but America has something else that matters—a belief in the future.

I will be the first to admit that there ARE many Stupid Americans. Yes! Yes! We ARE stupid! Very! We are stupid when we compare the US to …the US. BUT… when you compare the US to other countries, mmm…. things change a bit to the tune of…. well, we’re *not* all as “different” (in the department of smartness) as you Americanophobic Canadians and Europeans would like to think.

Why don’t we do a little exploring?

The problem with Americanophobia is a strong sense of “moral superiority” coupled with “over-confidence”, so much over-confidence to the point where Americanophobes typically filter what they read or learn to suit their own agenda leading to just about the same amount of ignorance that they accuse 300+ million Americans that they’ve never met before of. And here are pages and pages of examples of British unintelligence and ignorance.

People like me know that a lot of you Americanophobes get your information from the biased media, hearsay (mom and dad), Noam Chomsky, Al Gore, and your all time favorite hero, Michael Moore. (He’s the one man you excuse for being fat.) But is he FAT with knowledge when it comes to accurate statistic gathering and information?

Let’s take a look at that, shall we?

Remember that book you read so many times that you’ve lost count of called, “Stupid White Men” by Michael Moore? (Psst…. yes, that’s the same book that brainwashed you to believe that all Americans are white.) Anyway, some people took him to task and challenged his statistics. What did they find? They found data that Michael Moore conveniently left out. You can read the full rebuttal here, and I’ll just leave the key points for you to examine.

Case Study #1:

Many factors help to explain why so many adults demonstrated English literacy skills in the lowest proficiency level defined (Level 1). Twenty-five percent of the respondents who performed in this level were immigrants who may have been just learning to speak English. Nearly two-thirds of those in Level 1 (62 percent) had terminated their education before completing high school. A third were age 65 or older, and 26 percent had physical, mental, or health conditions that kept them from participating fully in work, school, housework, or other activities. Nineteen percent of the respondents in Level 1 reported having visual difficulties that affect their ability to read print.

Not to mention that 4% of those surveyed (1,100 of 26,000) were serving time in jail. Surprise: functional English literacy is not high among the blind and visually-impaired, people learning to speak English, and prison inmates. This hardly makes the US a place that “GOES OUT OF ITS WAY TO REMAIN STUPID AND IGNORANT,” in Moore’s typically capitalized phrase. (SWM, p. 87). By the way, as the National Adult Literacy Survey confirmed, a disproportionate share of those Moore labels “STUPID AND IGNORANT” happen to be blacks and hispanics.

In any event, as Michael Moynihan points out, limited functional literacy is a worldwide event: “almost 20 per cent of Australian adults had inadequate literacy skills to be effective in everyday life;” “some 25 per cent of Irish adults are functionally illiterate and approximately another 20 per cent can perform only simple reading and writing tasks;” “American teenagers rank higher than the Germans in all three subjects (math, literacy and science); 30 percent of Germans drop out of university, roughly equivalent to Mexico;16% hold university degrees, compared with 35% in the United States.”

Frankly, if Mike was of the working class, instead of a pretender to it, he’d understand something that I learned back in the No. 1 tunnel at Pima Mines. These guys may not write like Shakespeare, or go home to read Neitzsche and Spengler, but they are smart, live in the real world, and know one heck of a lot about the things that matter. I was in college, working summers, eventually bound for a doctorate in law — and they left me in the dust when it came to knowledge of current politics.

Case Study #2: Is it purely an American phenomenon when it comes to the inability to read maps properly?

Young adults worldwide are not markedly more literate about geography than the Americans. On average, fewer than 25 percent of young people worldwide could locate Israel on the map. Only about 20 percent could identify hotspots like Afghanistan, Iran and Iraq. Of all the young adults in the survey, only about one-third in Germany, Sweden and Japan, could name four countries that officially acknowledge having nuclear weapons. In the rest of the countries that number dropped to less than a quarter. In France 24 percent did not know that that their own country was a nuclear nation.

The facts…

89% of Canadians couldn’t locate Iraq on a map, a higher “ignorance rate” than that of the United States.

81% of Canadians couldn’t locate Israel on a map

5% of Canadians couldn’t locate Canada on a map

90% of Britons couldn’t locate Iraq on a map, again a worse figure than that of the US

21% of Britons couldn’t locate the USA on a map

7% of Britons couldn’t locate the England on a map

Swedes scored highest in the poll — but even there 70% couldn’t find Iraq.

Case Study #3: A Canadian Broadcasting Corporation blunder?

And possibly the world record on geographical foulups? The Canadian Broadcasting Corporation has a granite map of North America on the floor of its lobby. A few minor problems: it shows shows Vancouver Island as a peninsula, and shows no trace of the Queen Charlotte Islands. In compensation for that loss, it gives Canada the state of Alaska. As the Ottawa Citizen reported,

This isn’t the first time a bold new geography has been created for the North American continent. In July, the inaugural issue of the Canadian Tourism Commission’s magazine, PureCanada, contained a map that eliminated Prince Edward Island, Labrador, Halifax and Fredericton.

And just last month, Ottawa International Airport’s new terminal was opened, and a map in the baggage area located Atlanta in the middle of Alabama, Chicago in Wisconsin and Washington, D.C., in Virginia. Perhaps the map was meant to indicate where your luggage would end up. You know, if you fly to Atlanta, you’ll have to pick up your bags in Alabama, and so on.

Case Study 4: Stupid British people

To show American ignorance isn’t different from Canadian ignorance, you may want to look at these two reads:

• Half of Canadians too Ignorant to be Canadian
• More on Ignorant Canadians here.

Oh Canadians love to exalt themselves above Americans for their lack of knowledge about Canada. Yet Canadians are equally ignorant and arrogant about even their own country. Surprisingly even the CBC seems to agree on this one:

“It’s not the first time I’ve encountered this kind of ignorance. When I arrived at Carleton University in Ottawa to study journalism, some of my classmates wondered if I was there because there were no universities in Alberta. I am not making this up! Others found it curious that my parents would choose such a province to live in. They never spelled it out but it was always, “Oh, you’re from Alberta? Really? I thought only cowboys lived there.” Then the ha-ha.”

But you ask, why do we always find videos about Stupid Americans on Youtube and on TV all the time?

Dumb Americans are a money-making machine in the US. We don’t mind internationally humiliating ourselves in public. Americans love to poke fun at the dumb just as much as you guys do! However, the difference between Americans and those from other countries, is the televised exposure of said ignorance. The very fact that you are entertained by our stupidity, puts money into our pockets. (Psst… remember, we’re the fat greedy capitalists that will do ANYTHING for money – ANYTHING.)

A blogger from a non-American country (I don’t know where he’s from) mentioned possible reasons as to why Americans can come off as “stupid”.

I feel quite perplexed sometimes as to why there is so much animosity towards American’s and their culture. I feel as though I have missed something because as far as I can see, and from friendships I have with American’s, I just don’t see anything wrong with them (on an individual level). They are the most positive people I have ever met.

Then he starts to talk about our TV over here:

“…Actually on that point, I believe that TV is the main culprit that contributes to the animosity towards America. Firstly the programs that we have on TV do not paint American’s as the most brightest of people.

We are all influenced by our senses, and what rewards those senses. When what we see on TV is full of a collective of people that are doing humiliating things then we are rewarded by almost feeling empowered that we are not part of that culture. Does that make sense? To me it does. I may seem quite bent against the media at the moment, which I am, and also is a quite contradictory as my family is full of people in the media – like my oscar/bafta winning sister – my internationally known photographer brother – etc etc – but I can really see that a lot of ills in this world are the direct consequence of what is on TV. Is that really a surprise though? We are all but sheep looking here and there for where to go. Even the most head strong of people are to a point easily influenced. We are all born a blank slate. I really did digress.. must focus!So I believe that a lot of what feeds this anti-American sentiment is the direct result on what we see on TV and read on the paper.”

Read the rest of his story here.

One commenter said the following:

When I was younger I travelled quite a bit but now that I have to pay my own bills I am forced to work, which has reduced my travel abroad.

Each country has their own strange quirky trait. But I’ve tried not to classify the people of that region based on that.

I am from the US, as you can probably tell, and the funny thing is that nobody in the US watches that kind of TV unless you are unemployed or brain dead.

I’m not saying you are, but for some reason this stupid TV is passed to other shores.

When I was younger, I based my opinion of Brits on Benny Hill.

Americans, for the most part are hard workers and care about the things that are important. Please note; just as in every society, in every country there are different levels of socio-economic classes. The US has the same.

It is very true that a picture of the average “Uncle Sam” is created in one’s mind from the TV that Canadians and Europeans secretly love to watch. They say that they hate these shows and only watch them to laugh at the Americans. Newsflash: That’s the same reason that those stupid shows are so popular over here. Why are they so popular in Canada, Europe, America and all over the world? Because we (everybody) actually DO feel “empowered” or better about ourselves when we watch a bunch of idiots making FOOLS out of themselves. I even talked to my husband about this phenomenon. I have my own short-comings as much as the next person, and by watching goofy people on Jerry Springer (which is 95% fake anyway), I feel that I’m not so bad after all. Any current problem that I may be tackling in the present is no longer the big issue I had thought it to be after watching someone on The Maury Show having banged 1554500645 guys and wonder whom the father is for each baby. My life isn’t so bad any more…..

And the end of the day, we’re all humans, aren’t we?

Next, if you read, “Hating America” by Bruce Bawer (an American living in Europe), you will see that Europeans put the same amount of smart cards on table as Americans. We’re just about even. Or are we?

I moved from the U.S. to Europe in 1998, and I’ve been drawing comparisons ever since. Living in turn in the Netherlands, where kids come out of high school able to speak four languages, where gay marriage is a non-issue, and where book-buying levels are the world’s highest, and in Norway, where a staggering percentage of people read three newspapers a day and where respect for learning is reflected even in Oslo place names (“Professor Aschehoug Square”; “Professor Birkeland Road”), I was tempted at one point to write a book lamenting Americans’ anti-intellectualism—their indifference to foreign languages, ignorance of history, indifference to academic achievement, susceptibility to vulgar religion and trash TV, and so forth. On point after point, I would argue, Europe had us beat.

Yet as my weeks in the Old World stretched into months and then years, my perceptions shifted. Yes, many Europeans were book lovers—but which country’s literature most engaged them? Many of them revered education—but to which country’s universities did they most wish to send their children? (Answer: the same country that performs the majority of the world’s scientific research and wins most of the Nobel Prizes.)

Yep, you guessed it. America. Oh and the hypocrisy?

“…And while Americans’ relative indifference to foreign news is certainly nothing to crow about, the provincial focus of Norwegian news reporting and public-affairs programming can feel downright claustrophobic. Hertsgaard illustrates Americans’ ignorance of world geography by telling us about a Spaniard who was asked at a wedding in Tennessee if Spain was in Mexico. I once told such stories as well (in fact, I began my professional writing career with a fretful op-ed about the lack of general knowledge that I, then a doctoral candidate in English, found among my undergraduate students); then I moved to Europe and met people like the sixtyish Norwegian author and psychologist who, at the annual dinner of a Norwegian authors’ society, told me she’d been to San Francisco but never to California.”

Americans dominate medicine and science: US medical schools are at the top of the world. Doctors come from all over the world to train in the US with the biggest teaching hospitals being the Mayo Clinic and John Hopkins. We globally dominate the modern pop culture that YOU secretly devour. The most inventions and patents in technology are attributed to the US. Some examples are the lightbulb (Thomas Edison got the 1st one working *commercially*), telegraph: Samuel F. B. Morse (“Although many researchers had worked on similar projects prior to Morse, his was the first instrument that could successfully send messages across wires utilizing electricity”).

More information on our inventions can be found here.

James Dreyer has some insight on “Stupid Americans”.

Let’s define “stupid” before we begin to answer the question, “Are Americans really stupid versus the rest of the World?”. Webster defines “stupid” as being “slow of mind; given to unintelligent decisions or acts; lacking intelligence or reason”, etc.

Well, that clears that up.

Are Americans slow of mind? Some are; some aren’t.

Are Americans given to unintelligent decisions or acts? Sometimes.

Are Americans lacking in intelligence or reason? Some are.

Are all Americans stupid? No. Are Americans the only Nationality that are slow of mind at times, make unintelligent decisions every once in awhile, or may be lacking in intelligence or reason? No.

I think that the topic may have been better worded to ask, “Why do American Students appear to be lagging behind students in other part of the World?”. I have an answer for that one…

Read the full story here.

But then you ask for the 699885520048314th time, “But you elected Bush, not once… but twice!”. You are stupid!

No! You REALLY did ask THAT many times! Ignorance is bliss.

Usually when I’m asked dumb questions, I usually reply with dumb answers. But I digress…. I will answer this one for the 98500550300987th time.

Election #1 November 2000:

Al Gore won the POPULAR vote. Bush did *not* win.

Election #2 November 2004:

Bush won the popular vote AND the electoral college vote. He won by 2%

Ladies and Gentlemen, we have an electoral voting system in America that, in my opinion, is unfair and not indicative of a democracy. In EVERY election, the electoral colleges decide. The popular vote doesn’t really count.

So, to you yank-haters out there, no… we Americans don’t all think alike. With 300+ million Americans, how could anyone think that we’d all think the same? We’re very diverse in every way, shape, and form. And I like America because of this.

But really, we still have a problem with Stupid Americans. Here’s one man’s explanation. I find it to be very true. And at the end, he says something that we all should keep in mind:

It all boils down to the fact that knowledge and intelligence are two different issues. Rote memorization of world capitals does not equate intelligence.

I do find it interesting that Europeans have such strong opinions on this, considering that there are many more pressing issues to be concerned about. Perhaps the steady European refrain of “Americans are stupid” is a reflection of their own deep-rooted insecurity. You know — an inferiority complex.

By the way, I have an American friend who lives in Finland and her husband (a Finish guy) used to get PAID for going to college. So, if Americans ARE a few points down the scale in IQ compared some other countries, that can also be another reason. And for freaksakes, we’re only 1 point lower than that of Canada! To all of you Americanophobes, get the hell over yourselves, already!

Anyway, let’s just say for the sake of argument that ALL Americans are “stupid”. Why would that be something to get so alarmed about insomuch to wait all day for an American to pass by on the internet or in the streets of London to flame them? Why be obsessed so much with a group of dumb people? Do you argue with people who have Down Syndrome? Well, of course not! Then, why do you chase Americans around all day? There are American Pride groups on Facebook (not as much as there are Canadian Pride groups, mind you). Here’s what’s interesting for me. In every American Pride group on Facebook, the number of Britons and Canadians significantly OUTWEIGH the number of Americans in those groups. I find that quite the fascinating. Brits and Canadians purposefully search for American Pride groups for this purpose and this purpose only: to taunt. Now, if you don’t do this with the mentally retarded, why… oh why do you pick on the stupid, stupid fickle-minded Americans? If they don’t know what they’re talking about, why bother with them? Could it be that you’re just as stupid as THEM and you feel an irresistible emotional connection?

I will fess up. I argue with the Americanophobes. And, yes, I’m very stupid for that.

And when you call all Americans stupid (by the way), you’re not only wrong, you’re not only being inflammatory and juvenile, but you’re also being racist. Did it not ever occur to you that blacks, Mexicans, Asians…etc are all Americans too? But now that we’re on the topic of “racism”, you might not want to be too overly confident about your IQ scores.

In any event, if you cannot find any other ways to piss off the mentally-challenged AKA “the Americans”, you can always use this as a last resort.

Good luck and G’day.